DietCoke, I bid thee adieu…

My former lover

Good bye diet coke.  My beloved and apparently bad 10 year habit.  My urologist told me that I can't drink you any longer.  You are in the words of my doctor, "the single worst thing you can drink."  He explained all this to me while I sat squirming with mild groin pain on his exam table.  After he reviewed my CT scan, he broke the news - you have a kidney stone.

Diet coke has oxalates which comprise a lot of kidney stone material; and features phosphoric acid which leaches calcium from your bones.  Diet coke creates the perfect storm for stones.  My stone (I named him Timmy) was 5 mm, size of grain of rice.  I had to pee in a sieve and capture Timmy to give to my doctor for analysis.  Just another day in a kidney stoners life.  Sieving your pee so you can then collect the specimen to give to your doctor.  This alone made me vow to never drink the brown rivers of diet coke again.  One of my friends heard this and said she is never coming to my house for noodles or pasta or tea.

Of course I over-googled kidney stones in between peeing through all my kitchen sieves.   In my research I read a lot of first person accounts of giant, painful odysseys that lasted for days, months with cramping, blood and damaged urethras (mostly the men).  It was eye opening.  I had to shut my computer down after a while.  While I waited for Timmy to pass, I drank a ton of water and went to the bathroom about 28 times a day.  All the while thinking that I needed to break ties with my DC BFF.

Since we parted ways, I've been introduced to my new friends, sparkling water and its plainer cousin still water.  Both don't have the conversational abilities of Diet Coke but try to make polite chit chat.  I hope someday they will develop a non-harmful drink with the acidic zest of Diet Coke without the Timmys.



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